Tearing My Hair Out!

Needed my passport tonight to order airline tickets for an upcoming trip, and it wasn't where it was supposed to be. Finally found it (phew). Since my birth certificate was with it, I started to feel pretty desperate. It would have been a challenge to replace both the birth cert and the passport and THEN get airline reservations in time for our trip. Four of us are traveling together, and we want to book the flights together so that we arrive at the same time.

The upside? I now know where EVERYTHING in the house is! I have looked in every box in every closet and in every drawer. I also found a lost password, as well as the keypad code to my car door. I never memorized it because I always use the keyless entry. Wonder if it still works?

So back to square one. Guess we'll order the tickets tomorrow. Hope the fares don't go up by then!

Photo Poem

When was the last time you saw acres of sky?

Or sat in the grass and let the wind wash over you, with no discernible sound of human activity?

Or contemplated the metaphors for life found in old farm structures?

Or saw light at the end of a hazy pathway?

Getting away can give you a new perspective on things.

Though there is always work to be done.

House of Fish

Image found at fishdeals.com

This place is turning into a fish house. Our 125 gallon aquarium currently has a partition in it to protect the pleco (sucker catfish) from the cichlids. He was under assault and losing fins fast. He is recovering nicely, but the partition can't stay up forever; it's ugly, and the cichlids need the run of the tank for optimal health.

Enter the 55 gallon aquarium, set up and cycling as we speak. The aquarium has to cycle through some chemical/biological phases before it's ready for fish. Once this one is ready to roll, the pleco will move in. His tankmates will be some nice, friendly community fish who will be unlikely to cause him any problems.

We lost one catfish already, sadly, to the aggressive cichlids in the other tank. My web research shows that it was a species of fish best left to nature or the truly large (commercial) aquariums. I think the cichlid mix in the 125 gallon tank (it's not my tank) is a little bit questionable. So what happens when they get bigger and more territorial? Will they spawn more fish tanks? And what happens if the pleco outgrows the 55 gallon tank? He just might.

Welcome to the South Jersey House of Fish!

Lions and Tigers and Bears

Aquariums, laptop-shopping and facebook taking up my time these days, oh my! Must find time to post. I like blogger better than facebook, yet somehow facebook draws you in. Social engineering at it's finest. Or most devious.

I'll come up with a real post soon, I promise!

Surprise!

My very good friend and fellow blogger, Mommanator, is having a giveaway in honor of her 300th post over at Grannie's Ramblings. Stop by and enter for a chance to win something good!

Lost

I recently read the book Lost by Gregory Maguire. Maguire is the author of Wicked and Confessions of an Ugly Stepsister, which I have also read. Lost is about haunting, in more than one sense of the word. It wasn't as good as the other two novels, but it has haunted me.

The main character in the book faces a ghostly haunting that seems to be a manifestation of her own haunted emotional state. She has fallen into a pattern of marking time, failing to move forward, because of the events of her past and emotions that she can't quite seem to acknowledge or let go of. She is stuck and she has lost herself.

I feel like that character. I have made several major life changes over the last few years, some by choice and some not, and I've lost myself somewhere in the shuffle. The fallout is more than I ever expected.

In the book, the word 'lost' applies in at least two ways: the character is lost, and she has lost (suffered loss). I don't think I would have understood this entirely if I were not in a similar state.

The main character in the book has something of a breakdown. I am not about to do that. And this doesn't mean that there is nothing good in my life. It's just that too much change too fast leaves you whiplashed. And lost.

Double Bind

Conversation in my household tonight:

Me: Here's a quote from Oscar Wilde: A man can be happy with any woman as long as he does not love her.

Him: (Laughter - a good belly laugh.)

Me: Do you love me?

Him: (Silence.)