"I've always wanted to take dear Pax for an outing at the bitch but we've abandoned the idea, I can't walk in the sand, in heels and the wheels of Pax's chair would get tangled in all the seaweed."
Here is my reply:
It's hard enough to walk in the sand, let alone to push one of those rolling chairs through it. Perhaps a trip to the Wildwood Boardwalk would be a better alternative. You could ride up and down the boards in the luxury of the tram. No need to fear for the safety of the pedestrians, since they play the recorded message, "Watch the tram car please, watch the tram car please." In fact, they play it over and over and over, ad infinitum.
The Atlantic City boardwalk offers rolling chairs pushed (for a fee) by entrepreneurial types. The rolling chairs give you more freedom to choose your destination, and they offer a bit more privacy.
Failing both of the above, Mr. M and I could power a surrey on the Ocean City Boardwalk that would enable the two of you to tour in style. The model at the top of the page has enough room for crinolines and oxygen tanks, but the model pictured here is available if you desire the romance of the pretty little surrey with the fringe on top.
So you see, the Jersey Shore can accomodate ladies and gentleman of leisure. There is no need ever to dip so much as a little toe into the sand or the ocean.